Tweeter and the Monkey Man

Cop chases dealers.
His sister loves one of them.
Welcome to Jersey.

This is the most ambitious of the songs on the first Traveling Wilburys album, from 1988, mainly because it’s a pure Dylan original. It’s one of those guys-on-the-lam stories involving some of the shadier and weirder members of the blue-collar professions, and perhaps in another universe could have belonged to Tom Waits or Barry Adamson. It also owes a bit to Bruce Springsteen (Highway 99, Thunder Road, the New Jersey setting, etc), who I imagine could have done this Nebraska-style if he wanted to.

Characters:
Tweeter
Monkey Man
Undercover cop
Jan, his sister
Bill
State trooper

The plot, in brief:
- Tweeter and the Monkey man are selling cocaine and has because they need money.
- They're selling it to an undercover cop, whose sister Jan for unexplained reasons loves the Monkey Man.
- Tweeter was a boy scout, then a Vietnam vet. Life's been cold to him. 
- Tweeter and Monkey steal a car and take Highway 99 across the Jersey line (Bruce!)
- The cop hates the Monkey Man and wants to put him away. 
- Jan married a racketeer named Bill at 14 and called the Monkey Man secretly from her hilltop mansion.
- Tweeter and the Monkey Man are on Thunder Road (Bruce!) and they run in to the undercover cop, who demands that they surrender.
- Ambulance and a state trooper arrive. Tweeter relieves him of his gun and "messes up his mind." 
- They tie the undercover cop to a tree near an abandoned factory and a souvenir stand.
- The cop is pissed off, and now it's personal. He remembers Jan telling him, though, "It was you to me who taught
In Jersey anything's legal as long as you don't get caught."
- Tweeter and the Monkey Man run out of gas near Rahway Prison.
- Jan, at home, has a telepathic urge. She tells Bill, "'There's someplace I gotta go'. She took a gun out of the drawer and said, 'It's best if you don't know.'"
- The cop turns up dead, face down in a field. The police are closing in on Tweeter and the Monkey Man meanwhile. Monkey's on the bridge, using Tweeter as a shield.
- Presumably, they go down shooting.
- Jersey City's quieting down again. Bob's sitting there in a bar called the Lion's Den, thinking it's time to beat it for Florida.

Like a Ship

I wish she'd leave, as
Her love is a ship, and I'm
Gonna be keel-hauled.

A Traveling Wilburys single. The lyrics speak for themselves. The song was released as a bonus track on the 2007 reissue of the first Traveling Wilburys album. The album first came out in 1988.

Like a ship on the sea, her love rose over me
Like a ship on the sea, her love rose over me
Go 'way, go 'way, let me be

Like a weepin' willow tree, her love hangs over me
Like a weepin' willow tree, her love hangs over me
Go 'way, go 'way, let me be.

Standin' on the white cliffs of Dover
Lookin' out into space
Another channel to cross over
Another dream to chase

The night is dark and dreary
The wind is howling down
Your heart is hanging heavy
When your sweet love ain't around

Like a leaf on a tree, her love is shakin' me
Like a leaf on a tree, her love is shakin' me
Go 'way, go 'way, let me be
(Hauntin' me like a ship on the sea)
Like a leaf, like a ship on the sea
(Hauntin' me like a ship on the sea)

Handle With Care

Old rock n' rollers
Need TLC from young girls.
Won't you help them out?

I took a possibly inexcusable liberty with "Handle With Care," the first song from the first Traveling Wilburys album. Nowhere in the lyrics of this lovely song do the Wilburys say or imply that the "baby" who's the subject of the song is a younger woman. Nevertheless, old rock 'n rollers have a history of hooking up with women who, as they say, "stay the same age," and I thought it would work here. The Wilburys on this album were Bob Dylan, Jeff Lynne of the Electric Light Orchestra, Tom Petty, George Harrison and Roy Orbison.

Things that have happened to our old men:

- Beaten up, battered around, sent up, shot down, fobbed off, fooled, robbed, ridiculed, stuck in airports, terrorized, sent to meetings, hypnotized, overexposed, commercialized, been made to feel up tight, been a mess.

Locations of abuse:
- Daycare centers, night schools, airports

Instructions for proper use:
- Handle me with care, show that you care, put your body next to mine, dream on.

The proper candidate:
- Be the best thing I've ever found
- Be adorable
- Be able to receive some love
- Careful
- Be open to being leaned upon

Dirty World

She's like a fast car,

She's unsafe at any speed,

But sexy in gear.

This is one of the sillier songs by the Traveling Wilburys, and definitely one of their grooviest. It's the second track on their first album, and offers a lighter tone than some of the classic rock nostalgia that gives other parts of the album (Handle With Care, End of the Line, Heading for the Light, etc) its bittersweet autumn guitar feeling.

What he loves about you in the verses:

- Sexy body, dirty mind

- Grabbing him from behind

- The thought of introducing her to the other members of his gang

- How you make his legs quiver and his mind bend

- Your sense of humor and your disposition.

He also wants to change your oil for free, but knows you don't need a wax job because you're already smooth enough. He also offers to drive your pickup truck and park it where the sun doesn't shine. Of course, she goes to the airport in the end and he goes home to cry. Then Bob, George, Roy, Jeff and Tom tell you other things that they like about you:

- Electric dumplings

- Red bell peppers

- Fuel injection

- Service charge

- Five-speed gearbox

- Long endurance

- Quest for junk food

- Big refrigerator

- Tremblin' Wilbury

- Marble earrings

- Purple curtains

- Power steering

- Bottled water

- Parts and service

Congratulations

Good job, heartbreaker.

You weren't happy until

You walked out on me.

Here's a standard jilted-lover lament led by Bob Dylan on the first Traveling Wilburys album from 1988. I remember the summer this came out because I had my first job, as a busboy and dishwasher at the Village Cheese Shop in Haddonfield, New Jersey. I worked with an allegedly cocaine-addled, hostile cook and country-western songwriter, ass to ass in a tiny kitchen, with the radio always tune to 94.1 FM, WYSP Philadelphia, the classic rock station. The debut of the Traveling Wilburys was a hot event for rock n' roll fans. It was a super group comprising George Harrison, Jeff Lynne of the Electric Light Orchestra, Bob Dylan, Tom Petty and Roy Orbison. I can't remember if we first heard these songs on 94.1 or 93.3. WMMR, but I do remember that this and all the other songs were on all summer. To prevent illegal taping and distribution, the DJs would speak quickly at various points during the song, sullying the delivery and frustrating bootleggers. I fell in love with the album, and have always come back to it. "Congratuations" isn't one of the tracks that the record company and radio stations pumped as heavily as others, but it's a great song.

Here are the things for which Bob wishes his former lover congratulations:

1. Breaking my heart.

2. Tearing it all apart.

3. Leaving me in need.

4. Bringing me down.

5. Leaving me sorrow bound.

6. Getting a good deal.

7. How good you must feel.

8. Making me wait.

9. Making it too late.

10. Coming out on top.

11. Never knowing when to stop.

Congratulations

Good job, sweet baby.
You broke Bob's heart. Was it good?
Bob isn't so thrilled.

Congratulations

Good job, sweetie.
You broke Bob's heart. Was that nice?
Bob isn't so thrilled.