Saturday, June 6, 2015

Handle With Care

Old rock n' rollers
Need TLC from young girls.
Won't you help them out?

I took a possibly inexcusable liberty with "Handle With Care," the first song from the first Traveling Wilburys album. Nowhere in the lyrics of this lovely song do the Wilburys say or imply that the "baby" who's the subject of the song is a younger woman. Nevertheless, old rock 'n rollers have a history of hooking up with women who, as they say, "stay the same age," and I thought it would work here. The Wilburys on this album were Bob Dylan, Jeff Lynne of the Electric Light Orchestra, Tom Petty, George Harrison and Roy Orbison.

Things that have happened to our old men:

- Beaten up, battered around, sent up, shot down, fobbed off, fooled, robbed, ridiculed, stuck in airports, terrorized, sent to meetings, hypnotized, overexposed, commercialized, been made to feel up tight, been a mess.

Locations of abuse:
- Daycare centers, night schools, airports

Instructions for proper use:
- Handle me with care, show that you care, put your body next to mine, dream on.

The proper candidate:
- Be the best thing I've ever found
- Be adorable
- Be able to receive some love
- Careful
- Be open to being leaned upon

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